Breast Cancer is “Never Behind” a Survivor

Recently a distant second cousin sent me a text message and noted “I am happy to hear your breast cancer is behind you now”.

I look at that text occasionally and wonder what he meant. I believe he, like most people, believes that once your treatment is over, your life goes on and your cancer ordeal is behind you. I know these people mean well.

In reality, breast cancer is never “behind many of us” completely. Many of us still take pills daily with various side effects to minimize the risk of the cancer returning. And many undergo yearly “scans” to ensure the cancer has not spread. Some of us struggle with “ how am I supposed to live my life now knowing that the cancer can come back”.

Fewer than 1 in 3 women who are diagnosed with early-stage breast cancer later develop metastatic breast cancer, according to the American Cancer Society. I have learned that reducing stress, eating healthy, exercising regularly, and reducing alcohol intake all can lower the risk of the cancer returning. I have always exercised regularly and eaten healthy foods. I did not know until I was diagnosed with breast cancer how much drinking alcohol contributed to the risk of getting breast cancer. Starting around my early 30’s to early 50’s, I easily consumed two glasses of wine a day. I also worked in a stressful career for 35 years until my retirement in 2019.

As a now six year breast cancer survivor, I have tried to live my life as stress free as possible and have tried to focus on doing things I enjoy the most. Fortunately these are simple things like hiking, reading, spending time with family, and volunteering for non profits I support including the one I founded in 2020, Kristis Klimbers Foundation, a 501c3 that supports the cancer community

I have also become much more vocal at various retirement jobs I have since my diagnosis when I see blatant discrimination or abuse of employees. I think this is because of the uncertainty of my future, and due to a more fierce desire to try to help those I see as “the underdog”.

I am fine emotionally “most of the time” but then for reasons I have yet to understand, I get anxious about my cancer returning a couple times a year and spend days ensuring all the details of my estate are current. I also read obituaries of women who recently died of breast cancer to find out what stage of breast cancer they had when they were first diagnosed. I wonder what contributed to the cancer returning of women who were initially diagnosed with an earlier stage of breast cancer than I was.

So instead of telling a cancer survivor “ I am happy your cancer is now behind you “, it may make more sense to just say “I am so happy you are doing well” and just know that many of us are still dealing with the emotional and physical side effects of our breast cancer diagnosis.